Monday, November 21, 2011

Studios Finally Tell Adam Sandler NO!


Adam Sandler's latest film "Jack and Jill" is swiftly tumbling down the box office hill, and that's bad news for Happy Madison productions. The funnyman has been eager to get to work on another creation of comedic brilliance, but is having trouble finding a studio willing to distribute his next project. So far there have been zero takers for his latest script "Flippy Crapwell: Toilet Repairman," and GPS decided to find out how far the comedian's stock has fallen in Tinseltown.


Studio execs know the bottom line is all about making cash for the company, and usually Sandler's low-brow antics are a surefire bet. But after "Jack and Jill" stumbled out of the gates, the corporate bigwigs aren't so certain anymore. "That turd cost eighty million bucks to make," one anonymous producer told us. "And for what? It's Adam Sandler in drag. How much does it cost for some woman's makeup and a lousy wig?" Our source went on to tell us that studios have basically grown tired of Sandler, and are doing audiences a favor by sparing them from future works of fecal matter. "I read the script for Flippy Crapwell: Toilet Repairman," said another producer. "Any script about a toilet repairman gets immediately flushed down the toilet as far as I'm concerned."

On Sandler's script for "Flippy Crapwell: Toilet Repairman"...

Hollywood producers "just say no"

It's not a very glowing endorsement from executives, but Sandler is still confident that he'll get "Flippy Crapwell" out of the sewers and into production. "I'm going old school on this one," Sandler said eagerly. "I'll be doing a third version of the Hanukkah song, and I've got a surprise cameo role for one of my buddies who only gets work when I put him in my films. Trust me guys, this is gonna be my best stuff when it finally gets made fo-shizzle!"

Just a hunch, but GPS thinks the surprise cameo is Rob Schneider
 
Could this be the end for Sandler and Happy Madison productions? With receipts for "Jack and Jill" continually heading south, it seems like it could be. We hope that "Flippy Crapwell" will eventually get the green light and reignite audience enthusiasm for the veteran comic. Until then, we can always look back and be amused by "Billy Madison." Now that was comedy gold wasn't it? Maybe not.


24 comments:

  1. Sounds awesome. I hope it gets made - preferably with another revered, old school actor cameo-ing. De Niro or Robert Redford.

    ReplyDelete
  2. @Robert...I'm already looking ahead to the special edition blu-ray of Flippy Crapwell.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Studios shouldn't say no to Sandler, but rather steer him in the right direction.

    ReplyDelete
  4. @Sam...I actually agree. He'd do well to have some sort of creative consultant on his payroll.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Studios finally telling Sandler NO?? Oh if only this were not just our wishful thinking, Markus! I liked Happy Gilmore but most of his movies are just so low brow.

    ReplyDelete
  6. @Ruth...I know right? Billy Madison being slightly amusing to me was quite a long time ago. I guess it's ok if people dig his humor, but if I were a big fan of his, I'd hope the quality of his work would improve which it never seems to do.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I kind of think Adam is a huge practical joker finding exactly what he can get away with before people actually stop showing up.

    I said it before but aside from Reign Over Me and Punch Drunk Love nothing he's done after 1998 deserved anything more than a DTV release. If anything, his films make the others in the box office more money than they would have otherwise...so perhaps not all his films are made in vain or to public distain then huh?P Great job again fellas:)

    ReplyDelete
  8. @Marc...he gets away with producing quite a bit of crap because of the box office, but I'm wondering if that will cool a bit after Jack and Jill.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Yeah, Adam sinked to a new low with Jack & Jill

    ReplyDelete
  10. @Dirty...did you actually see it? I can actually stomach some of his earlier work, but this looked even more gawd awful than usual.

    ReplyDelete
  11. That is a great pics of Schneider and Sandler. I used to be a big fan of Sandler back in the days when he would release good comedies one after the other - eg. Wedding Singer, Waterboy, Big Daddy...

    ...but Grown Ups was one of the worst things I've ever seen and Funny People was pretentious bullshit that just pissed me off. I have enjoyed some of his films over the last ten years - Click was good, I really liked Anger Management...but for the most part it has been disappointing.

    ReplyDelete
  12. @Dan...I've enjoyed some of his work too, but yeah...it's been pretty awful of late. Not that it was ever amazing.

    ReplyDelete
  13. @Dan Sad panda face for calling Funny People pretentious bullshit.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Pre....preten....pre ten anonymous?

    ReplyDelete
  15. You know, I watched Punch Drunk Love again over the holiday break, and I must say, Adam Sandler is really great in that flick. Just sayin...

    Maybe we stage an intervention.

    ReplyDelete
  16. @Robert...yeah after that you'd hope he'd at least explore some other types of roles. Maybe not dramatic..Jim Carrey tried and failed, but more quirky stuff like Punch Drunk.

    ReplyDelete
  17. C'mon Markus - we all know that Flippy would be a Kevin James vehicle. Sandler likes to save his roles for ones where he can be inexplicably cast alongside models and megahot actresses, and I just don't see that happening with a toilet repairman story. But for KJ and some lower-tier sorta cute actress who has to slum by acting opposite that tub of shit (sad panda face for Winona)? Definitely.

    ReplyDelete
  18. @Dylan...I'd agree about KJ being perfect for Flippy, but this is one Adam has been saving for himself. It's his old school throwback to his glory days.

    ReplyDelete