Monday, September 26, 2011

Anne Hathaway's Catwoman Costume Made of Actual Clothing; Fans Pissed.



Over the weekend, professional super-hero costume appraisers lost their collective shit when it was found out that Catwoman's attire did, in fact, include actual, flesh-covering fibers. This news was hard to take for some, such as poster yubnubrocks, who frequents a local film site. "Did someone from the Art Institute photoshop this? Holy fuck that is fake as hell," he opined from behind his mother's Dell keyboard. Another commenter, the_credible_hulk, thinks Nolan should "Recast Hathaway with Emily Blunt and re-film all of the catwoman scenes. Maybe, just maybe, you can save your picture."


With all this negativity surrounding the production team's hard work on a believable, yet sexy Catwoman outfit, one almost wishes respectable filmmakers would just get it over with already and cast this woman:

 Who the fuck is that? Don't know. Just wait until she bends over. Meeee-owww. Rawr, even. 


To help figure out what impact, if any, this sudden outburst of nerd rage has had on the production of The Dark Knight Rises, GPS sat down with the film's director, Christopher Nolan. In the interview, Nolan spoke very highly of his fans by letting us know that "...they aren't all basement-dwelling mouth-breathers." Point well taken, but do they hold any sway when it comes to his decision-making? "Sure. Sure they do. I read pretty much all the criticism that came down the wires this weekend. I want to let everyone know that I heard their pleas, and I agree. I'm in talks with Shannon Tweed as we speak. I think she has the lips to pull it off. No, um...no pun intended there."

We were skeptical about the director's plans, so we asked if that was really his solution to all of this. "Well, yes and no. I'm actually giving fans a choice between a more realistic cat-person, and Shannon Tweed with a whip. If fans log on to the official site between now and next Thursday, they'll be able to participate in the discussion by voting for their preferred direction(or "preFURred" direction) for the film going forward.

So, it's come down to this, folks:

Mama
This is my cat, Mama, with a mask on. When I think of her, I think about her licking my arm before she takes a shit in a box.

vs.

Shannon Tweed
This is Shannon Tweed with a mask on. When I think of her, I think about her licking my arm....and then taking a shit in a box? Wait, am I supposed to?

If things go awry come the film's release next year, you people will only have yourselves to blame.

7 comments:

  1. Haha. Hmm tough decision between Tweed or the Cat...Will pick the cat.

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  2. My cat thanks you.

    Gene Simmons, on the other hand....not so much.

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  3. What the hell? I can't pick the Comic Con chick? I'm ditching this popcorn stand, then...

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  4. If you want to voice your outrage, you'll first need to see if she's on IMDB. Try looking up "bikini cat." If she's not there, you're probably SOL. My condolences.

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  5. Damn it all! No luck. Lots of recommendations for Bikini Car Wash-type movies.

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  6. Kudos for actually looking that shit up. I was curious what the results would be. Not the worst, apparently.

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