Friday, April 6, 2012

American Pie Franchise To End On Somber Note



Fans of the "American Pie" franchise are no doubt happy that the gang has returned for yet another installment of wacky shenanigans, but inquiring minds are already eager to know when they can expect another serving. "American Reunion" directors Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg have recently stated that there's going to be one more slice of pie to enjoy after this, but it will literally be the nail in the series coffin. "American Funeral" is in the works, and will showcase what happens after the gang all die from old age and tired cliche humor.


Reunion star Jason Biggs was recently asked at a screening what part if any his character would play in the next Pie chapter. "I can tell you that my character's son will be dealing with losing his parents, and you better believe there will be some comedic funeral hijinks like a dick slammed in a coffin.....or someone boning Stiffler's mom's corpse," Biggs said enthusiastically. "As for me, my fifteen minutes of fame have been extended three sequels already so I'm pretty sure my time is about up and I won't make it back for another one."


Biggs checks to see how many of his 15 minutes are left



 Expect Stiffler's Mom's cougar corpse to be on the prowl

Could "American Funeral" truly be the last hurrah for these beloved films? We all know that in Hollywood a franchise never truly says die, but if "Reunion" and "Funeral" don't pull in big box office bucks, the series could be facing a lonely existence in the "American Hereafter."

30 comments:

  1. This was a hysterical post. Seriously. I was laughing today thinking of it.

    But goddamn it, wait til AFTER I've seen and reviewed a movie next time, will ya Markus? How the hell am I supposed to watch "American Reunion" tonight and NOT think theyre beating a dead horse? LOL...

    Thanks.

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    1. Thanks bro! Sorry about that. I've really got nothing against the franchise. I just had to pick on somebody today!

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  2. Well done Markus. Well done. Absolutely hysterical. *golf claps*

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    1. Much appreciated! Was the only big release out today I felt that was worth picking on.

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  3. Honestly, i think the pie is back its expiration date at is point. it feels ike the main cast realized there careers were going nowhere(With the exception of Hannigan) and decided to milk another buck

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    1. Money makes the pie go round! yeah you're right, Hannigan seems to be the only one who had any type of success after the first pie film

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  4. Absolutely hilarious post! This sequel would probably happen soon. Chris Klein needs work!

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    1. Yeah I think that Streetfighter film he did is worthy of Comeuppance!

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  5. Do they all die of venereal diseases?

    I was kind of looking forward to this but after everything I've heard I guess I'll pass.

    Oh and I kind of like Sean William Scott and I think he's done alright. Role Models was great and I've heard good things about Goon.

    Great post!

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    1. Goon looks decent. See "Slap Shot" if you haven't yet. As for Reunion, actually been hearing that it's OK.

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  6. Hahahahahahahahahaha...yes the great circle of life continues. Graduation, marriage, reunion, maybe a divorce or two and then a funeral. Brilliant post, my man. And tip of the hat for the 15 minute tagline:^)

    You could also call the next film American Haunting instead of American Hereafter, where by the guys haunt a co-ed locker room where Stifler's spirit always shows up in the men's roon:P

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    1. that could work, but isn't there already a film called American Haunting? screw it! we'll use it anyways!

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  7. I would rather see your script treatment for this film than go and watch this terrible film.

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    1. My script would be keenly witty and feature plenty of sexual funeral hijinks!

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  8. Markus if it was an Irish wake I do not think that would be a problem. ;-)

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    1. The Irish do love any chance to get down and boogie!

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  9. i think they should make another American Pie, with the original cast but when thier all married and have kids of thier own, think trhat would be GREATTTT!!!!

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    1. Haven't they already done that? (scratching head)

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  10. Excellent Paint work here, as usual (or, at least, my kind of excellent Paint work). Though...I could have sworn that bottom picture was actually a real shot of Tara Reid.

    Heyo!

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    1. Oh after all that bad plastic surgery for sure!

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  11. i think american funeral would just be stupid as fuck!!!!! i want another movie with the whole gang!!!!!!!!!!

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    1. and I'm sure you shall have it at some point as well as some more of those amazing direct to video band camp sequels. Enjoy!

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  12. Pie, Pie 2, Wedding and Reunion are the best and the series is great, I don't count those other movies. Hope they do come up with another movie with the old gang.

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  13. I think the new American pie should be about Jim's dad and Steve's Mom get married that would be funny that Jim and Steve would be step brothers.

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    1. hmmmm.....let me think....nah...I like my idea better.

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  14. I keep watching these american pie 1 2 wdding and reuinion over and over, i just cant get enough! im actually surprised a movie like these actually changed my whole life perspective i swear to god, i want a great long lasting friendship like the guys and a wonderful relationship like vicky and kevin, man i would do anything for that life... and jims dad omg.. what a wonderful life... cant wait this this comes out! ill be the first one in line most likely crying because the franchise is over

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    1. I too shall mourn your loss John Fakelastname. The American Pie franchise has brought us much over the years. Just try and remember the good things about the series and keep it alive in your heart......always.

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