@DRUNKHULK ENTER CELEBRITY REHAB WITH DR. DREW

"Celebrity Rehab" begins for @DRUNKHULK

@DRUNKHULK knew it was only a matter of time before his drunken posting on Twitter would get old. The gamma powered giant has recently been renowned for his intoxicated tweets, but has been feeling of late that he's hit rock bottom and in desperate need of a change. @DRUNKHULK has reached out to addiction medicine specialist Dr. Drew Pinsky and will be attempting to SMASH alcoholism on the new season of "Celebrity Rehab."

Best Dialogue Ever: Conan The Barbarian 1982

As far as Conan goes, there can be only one for me........Ahnold. Sure I'll check out the newest incarnation and hope that it reaches the awe inspiring heights of the 1982 John Milius classic, but nobody.........and I mean nobody will ever "burn you the way to paradise" the way Mr. Universe did. Now getting that out of the way I can present to you the newest series of posts on GPS "Best Dialogue Ever." I have to start with Conan.....it's the reason we're named Green People Soup. (fans of the film think about that if you want to know) Arnold didn't say much in the movie, but when he did, you had to be prepared to pay attention lest ye be eviscerated by his cold steel. Here he talks about what is best in life........listen closely or Crom will cast you out of Valhalla.

HULK Declines To Answer Questions Under Oath About Steroid Use

HULK has day in court

Preliminary hearings have begun in the super hero steroid abuse scandal that has been rocking the nation as of late, and the Incredible Hulk has refused to answer questions under oath. He was dressed sharply for his day in court, but refused to say anything that would incriminate fellow Avenger Club member Captain America.

Banjo Prodigy Discovered on "Georgia's Got Talent" Youtube Clip Watched By Millions

For Simon Cowell's new show "Georgia's Got Talent," it was 2009 all over again. When a local Cahulawassee River contestant stepped on the stage and started strumming his banjo, the former "American Idol" judge and his panel were absolutely stunned by the musical genius on display. The video clip of the performance was subsequently posted on Youtube and has garnered almost four million hits as of this writing. The kid from Georgia known only as Banjo Boy has gone viral, and the entire globe is simply delighted as they anticipate what he'll do for an encore in the next round of the contest.

The Red Skull: "The Captain Is Clearly On Steroids"

When asked about the steroid scandal that's currently a been a thorn in Captain America's side, the Red Skull was not at a loss for words about the star spangled avenger. "Der Junge ist offensichtlich auf Steroiden. Ich sah Steve Rogers, bevor er in die Armee eintrat und er war ein winzig kleines person. Am 22. Juli werde ich Captain America mit meiner ganz natürlichen Körper zu vernichten." GPS originally broke the news about the scandal and tell all book right here http://bit.ly/n5EZza

Netflix User Resorts To Prostitution As Price Hike Outrage Continues

Outrage towards the online rental giant continues as a Denver area man recently took extreme measures to pay for the upcoming price hike. When Roger Bobblecock heard that his current plan of one DVD out and unlimited streaming was being split and charged separately, the middle manager and father of three knew the situation had become dire. Roger's wife joked that they were going to have to turn tricks downtown to pay the increase, but it was no laughing matter when she actually had to bail him out of jail after being arrested for soliciting himself.

Harrison Ford: Lucas Is A F***ing Idiot

Upon hearing the news that George Lucas was digitally recasting the role of Han Solo made famous by Harrison Ford for the upcoming "Extra Extra Special Editions" of the original "Star Wars" trilogy, the 69 year old actor was not pleased. "He's a fucking idiot," said the grumpy Ford.  Asking what he thought about his replacement drew even more vitriol from the veteran thespian. "Twilight sucks and Pattinson is a no talent ass clown!" It's clear the cast of the original trilogy is not happy with their life's work being tampered with by the bearded one. GPS had the exclusive first look at the "Extra Extra Special Editions" right here http://bit.ly/qxLwZ7

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Lucas Digitally Recasting The Original Star Wars Trilogy

They say artists are their own worst critics. Never satisfied to rest on his laurels, George Lucas is planning on re-releasing the original Star Wars trilogy with digitally recast younger hipper actors in an attempt to better connect with today's movie going audience. We at GPS are extremely excited to give fans an exclusive first look at what the Jedi Master has planned for our beloved sci-fi series.

On Location: Dirty Harry

When my wife wanted to take a trip to San Francisco, there were only two things on my mind. The first was seeing Alcatraz, and the second seeing some of the famous Dirty Harry film locations. As a movie junkie, how do you not visit a few locales where Harry battled Scorpio by the bay?

Happy Birthday Geoffrey Rush!

For 43 more minutes, it will still be Geoffrey Rush's birthday. I really need to get better at checking birthdays BEFORE 11:30 at night. I'll get better as I get more accustomed to wishing people I'll never meet a long life, etc. Anyways, Rush turned 60 today, so let's make with the remembrance and such!